Sunday, April 22, 2012

Lies people told me

I have been thinking lately of the myths that so many people believe or have been told, myself included.

I am debunking some of these here.


1.
Myth: "Follow your heart" is horrible advice. DONT follow your heart. First of all, thats where your emotions come from. And unfortunately your emotions are not reliable, simply expressive. They are not rational. Jeremiah 17:9 puts it acurately: "The heart is deceitful above all things and without cure."

Fact: Clear discernment and careful thought produces great results. Ask for advice from people you look up to. Think things through, take your time, and I promise you won't regret it. James 1:5 says "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." There you go.

2.
Myth: "College is the best time of your life." College is an awesome, unique, and deeply rich time in your life. But like all seasons of life, it has a beginning and an ending. If you consider the epitomy of life to be late nights, more friends than you can juggle, awkward self-discovery challenges, and stupid first-time-not-under-my-parents-roof decisions, then maybe college will be the best time of your life.

Fact: College is an experience. It is temporary, exciting, challenging, fulfilling, humbling, exhausting and discouraging.  Like any experience, it is worth the haul.Your first year may or may not be a nightmare. Take it a day at a time. Don't remove yourself from community. Press in and I promise, "this too shall pass".

3.
Myth: "Divorce is an option." This is false. When you make a vow before God and another person to commit despite the obstacles, you should at least respect yourself enough to make your word mean something. Divorce is evil. There is nothing good about it, any way you look at it. Maybe take some more time learning and trusting the person you are wedding before making a vow. Because divorce isn't an option.

Fact: Marriage is meant to be for "as long as you both shall live." It doesn't matter how awful it gets. It doesn't matter if you "fall out of love." Learn to do disbelieve Myth #1 and maybe Myth #3 won't be an issue.

4.
Myth: "Follow your dreams" is kinda unrealistic. Although I'm learning to dream, I do not think that you should blindly follow your dreams. What if you dream of being a pop singer but you have no vocal talent? Or what if you want to be an NBA player, but you have no athletic ability? Dreaming is good and important, but within reasonable limits. That may seem contradictory, but if you do not dream responsibly, you may find yourself broke, lost and disillusioned.

Fact: Dreams are long, lonely, difficult roads. As my friend Sarah Mathias said in her last blog post, "I am realizing that when you do crazy things, only about 5% of it looks like a movie and the other 95% probably looks like hell that you want to get out of, change takes time and pain can break your heart, and when you think about how long it would take for someone to heal and all the work that would go into it and how much it would cost you. It's not very much like a movie at all, but it's better, if you can make it. If you are called down that road."


5.
Myth: "The grass is always greener on the other side." Mmmm, not so much. Learn to be grateful for what you have. Be content. 1 Tim 6:6-7 "But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world and we can take nothing out of it."

Fact: You have plenty of things to be grateful for. If you have a hard time imagining this, take out a sheet of paper and write down all the things you are thankful for. You will be surprised.


6.
Myth: "Pain is weakness leaving the body". This only applies to exercise, and even then it is contingent on whether you sustain an injury or are recovering from one. Do not apply this phrase to any other mental, emotional, spiritual or psychological area of your life.

Fact: Pain is not bad. Phil Yancey said that pain is an indicator of life, like when you are in an accident and the Dr. asks while probing you if you can feel anything. And if you can, that is good! Because pain indicates life, and therefore pain manifests life. Unless of course you tear your ACL or something, and in that case pain just sucks. Actually pain always sucks, but the result of pain can be very very good.

7.
Myth: "God helps those who help themselves" I don't really get this one. I feel like its self-explanatory: get off your butt and don't be lazy or act entitled. God doesn't abide by your rules.

Fact: Proverbs 14:23 "All hard work brings a profit."

8.
Myth: "You are what you eat."
Nuff said.

Fact: Eat healthy, be healthy.
9.
Myth: "Etiquette is old-fashioned." No, its not. It is the mark of a mature, classy individual. Things like: Guys who hold doors, women who dress modestly, guys who walk on the road-side of the sidewalk, waiting to eat until everyone is seated, bringing a gift to a party, always r.s.v.p.ing, doing what you say you are going to do, keeping your committments, not chewing gum on stage, saying please and thank you.

Fact: "Manners maketh man." ~ William of Wykeham.
"Good manners can open doors that the best education cannot." ~Clarence Thomas
"Politeness and consideration for others is like investing pennies and getting dollars back."~Thomas Sowell

10.
Myth: "Blondes have more fun."  False. Redheads do, obviously.

Fact: 75% of men say the first thing they notice about a women is her hair.
Yep. So good hair=fun. Obviously.


There you go. Feel free to disagree.


Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Bucket List

I've made a list somewhere before. I had a mental one for my senior year of college- it turned out pretty good actually. I DID sing in Edman Chapel on stage into a mic. I DID pray in Chapel and chat with Chappy K and President Ryken. I DID participate in an epic flashmob halftime show to inaugurate our new president, which you can view here. And I DID write a bunch of random people personal notes saying how they had unintentionally blessed me during my time at Wheaton (some I hadn't even spoken to). All in all, I think its a great thing to have a bucket list. Like dreaming. Which you may remember, I am learning to do.

So here is my list. Its a work in progress and process of course.
This is NOT in order of importance.
  1. Own a horse
  2. Visit my homeland: Ireland
  3. Play a different board game every day for a month
  4. Wear my mom's wedding dress (in some form) and my grandma's wedding band at my wedding
  5. Show one of my dogs in an AKC competition
  6. Have an herb garden
  7. Learn how to cook with fresh herbs
  8. Take a hot air balloon ride
  9. Go scuba diving with Sarah Mathias White
  10. Ride horseback in the ocean
  11. Search for buried treasure
  12. See the sunrise and the sunset on the same day
  13. Be debt free for the rest of my life
  14. Speak to students about Truth
  15. Come out with my own music album
  16. Swim with dolphins
  17. Hold a lion cub
  18. Ride an elephant
  19. Rescue a greyhound
  20. Do all the crafts on my DIY craft board on pinterest
  21. Learn to think before I speak
  22. Be in a movie
  23. Start an orphanage somehwere its needed, and run it
  24. Adopt a few kids
  25. Make my own wedding veil
  26. Have a 50th wedding anniversary
  27. Take a gondola ride in Italy along the canals
  28. Go to the Ellen DeGeneres show
  29. Visit England and wear a fancy hat somewhere it would be appropriate
  30. Enter a ballroom dance competition
  31. Run a 10K
  32. Grow flowers
  33. Help my Dad buy a boat
  34. Own a condo where all my family can vacation together
  35. See all my kids graduate and get married
  36. Visit my cousins in Africa and help them do missions where my Dad grew up
  37. Live in Europe
  38. Have a library room in my house
  39. Write and have a book published
  40. Have lunch with Francine Rivers
  41. Grow my hair out to my lower ribs
  42. Be in Times Square for New Years
  43. Go on a Disney Cruise
  44. Speak Spanish fluently
  45. Share Jesus with a stranger
  46. Learn to decorate cakes professionally
  47. Eat all natural foods and cook from scratch
  48. Own a car younger than me
  49. Be on a TV show like Wipeout, Survivor, or the Amazing Race
  50. Feel confident in a bikini
  51. Learn to play the guitar
  52. Live on a self-sufficient farm with goats and chickens and horses
  53. Throw an epic themed party (maybe a reunion, or a reception)
  54. Travel travel travel: Greece, Italy, Spain, Tailand, Africa, Norway, Ireland, Hungary, Hawaii
  55. Raise my kids along with my brother and sister-in-law
and much much more.